Ways of Coping with Unwanted Teenage Emotions

Teenage emotions tend to be more pronounced than those of adults. Adults are conditioned to hide their emotions because it is viewed as immature for an adult to fully express his or her feelings. Teenagers abide less to these views.

Fear and Anxiety

anxious female teenager biting her nails

This is the most prominent of all teenage emotions. Anxiety can be caused by a lot of things such as worry about passing your upcoming test. A common cause of teenagers’ anxiety is the dread of appearing foolish or unattractive to others. Teenagers suffer from what psychologists call imaginary audience. This is where you think that everyone is watching you as though you’re on a stage and that the audience is critical of you. So a girl walking into a classroom might think that everyone’s concerned about what she’s wearing. Or a guy falling in the school corridor might think that everyone will always think he’s stupid.

Coping Mechanism

No one’s watching you. People are too concerned about their own problems. They’re most likely as nervous as you about being judged. If you do something stupid, like falling in the school corridor, then laugh about it. If people laugh, then laugh with them. But remember that once it’s done, it’s done. Move on. People won’t think any less of you.


a teenager sitting down and feeling guilt

This emotion is caused by doing something that’s against your values. For instance, if you love your girlfriend and you cheat on her or you lie to her then you’ll feel guilty. Or if you value your health and you start smoking then you’ll feel guilty because you know that deep down this is not what you want for yourself.

Coping Mechanism

The best thing is not to go against your values to begin with. If you have, then speak to someone that you trust that will listen with an open mind and won’t judge you. This could be a school counselor, a teacher, a family member, a friend, a therapist or a priest.


You feel grief whenever you lose someone or something that you love. When you lose your boyfriend or girlfriend you grieve. You grieve when your parents divorce. You grieve the most when someone you love dies.

Coping Mechanism

Speak to someone that you trust to help you through this difficult stage. It’s very important to get all the support that you can get. So don’t be afraid to ask for help. The last thing that you need is to be alone. Speak to the people that I mentioned in the coping mechanism for guilt.

It's also important that you cry during this period of pain. Let your tears carry the pain out of your heart.

Another coping mechanism which you can use is to escape. I’m not talking about negative escape like doing drugs or sleeping around looking for love – that would be a stupid thing to do. If you use negative ways to escape then you’re only hurting yourself. You will have more emotional problems like guilt, shame and anger.

Positive ways of escaping include watching comedy movies; reading a book or joining a club. You can also play sports or hike. The trick is to have people around you while you do these activities. That way you won’t feel alone.


Anger is the most common of all teenage emotions, because most teens are rebellious, and it is the most powerful of all teenage emotions.

Anger is a foolish emotion. Some people say that anger is temporary insanity. That’s why they say “Don’t get mad”. When you’re angry you say and do foolish things that you later regret. Like when you’re arguing with your parents or your sibling.

cartoon of an angry guy teenager

Coping Mechanism

Use a positive means to escape. Get away from the thing or person that is making you angry. Take some time to cool down. A good way to escape that I use is to go to the gym. Sometimes I go for a walk or I jog. Stay away from drugs because they’ll make you hate yourself and make you be angry with yourself.

Also, find a neutral person that you trust and respect that you can speak to, such as the people that I suggested in the coping mechanism for guilt.


All teenage emotions are felt by adults too. It’s just that when you’re a teenager, your emotions are more pronounced because of all the changes you’re going through. Your body’s producing a lot of hormones and you’ve got stress from school, family and friends. Help is never far.

Don’t be shy. Go to the right people. Don’t be afraid to talk to your parents or friends if you’re having problems with your girlfriend or boyfriend for instance. Don’t be afraid to talk to your teacher if there’s something wrong at home.

The most important thing to remember is NOT TO DO DRUGS! Drugs will only add to these unwanted emotions.

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